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Saving Hollywood: Are Sly, Voight, and Gibson Cast in an Action Movie or ‘The Three Stooges’?
February 7, 2025
Hold onto your hats, folks, because Sylvester Stallone, Jon Voight, and Mel Gibson are on the presidential case to tackle Hollywood’s woes.
Now, before we dive headfirst into this bygone-era blockbuster trio, let’s get one thing straight: Hollywood ain’t exactly on life support. Sure, it’s facing some challenges, but it’s far from flatlining.
So, what’s the perceived problem? Well, according to the doomsayers, Hollywood’s creativity has gone the way of the dinosaur, replaced by an endless parade of superhero flicks, reboots and sequels. They bemoan the lack of originality, the obsession with political correctness, and the feeling that Hollywood’s become an elitist echo chamber, out of touch with the average Joe (and Jane).
But the real game-changer, the one that’s truly shaken Hollywood to its core, is the rise of the streaming giants. Remember those halcyon days of Blockbuster, where we’d brawl over the last copy of Gibson’s Lethal Weapon? Yeah, those days are as extinct as the dinosaurs. Netflix, Amazon and Apple are the new titans, wielding billions of dollars and armies of algorithms to conquer the entertainment landscape. They’re churning out content faster than a Stooges eye-poke, leaving traditional studios scrambling to keep up.
Meanwhile, the long-running production exodus that has been plaguing Hollywood for years is still a thorn in the industry’s side. FilmLA, the folks who track on-location filming in Los Angeles, are reporting a serious drop in shoot days. Why? Because those productions are skipping town faster than you can say, “Show me the money!” And where are they going? Well, it ain’t just some far-off land with lax labor laws.
Canada, our friendly neighbor to the north, has become “Hollywood North” with Vancouver and Toronto luring productions with their siren song of tax breaks, skilled crews, and diverse locations. Georgia’s also muscled its way into the game, transforming Atlanta into a Southern Hollywood hub (still part of the U.S.) with its own generous incentives and charming landscapes. And let’s not forget the international players — the U.K., Australia, New Zealand and even Eastern Europe are rolling out the red carpet for Hollywood productions, offering everything from medieval castles to state-of-the-art studios at a fraction of the cost.
So, back to our presidential posse. Can Sly, Voight and Gibson really wrangle this runaway train? While Sly’s still got the “Rocky” legacy and recent “Tulsa King” success, his blockbuster film days are in the rearview mirror. Ditto Mel Gibson, who’s also weighed down by controversy. As for Voight, he’s an Oscar-winning veteran, but that plaudit happened way back in 1979 — well before the advent of the internet and his starring role in Trump’s world.
The real power in Hollywood lies with the studio chiefs such as Alan Bergman at Disney, David Zaslav at Warner Bros. Discovery, and Donna Langley at Universal. They’re the ones greenlighting the big-budget spectacles and deciding which franchises get resurrected. Then there are the streaming titans such as Ted Sarandos at Netflix and Jennifer Salke at Amazon, who are shaping the viewing habits of millions with their data-driven decisions. And let’s not forget Zack Van Amburg and Jamie Erlicht, the heads of worldwide video programming at Apple, who are greenlighting shows such as “Ted Lasso” and “Severance.”
Now, this whole “aging action heroes saving Hollywood” scenario got me thinking —and perhaps it’s the decades I spent in the music business that sparked this comparison — but what if this was the music biz? Imagine the President tapping Ted Nugent, Gene Simmons and Kid Rock to rescue the industry from the clutches of streaming giants and dwindling profits. You’d have the Motor City Madman battling Daniel Ek at Spotify, the Demon negotiating with Oliver Schusser at Apple Music, and Kid Rock … well, Kid Rock would probably just be Kid Rock, stirring up a potent cocktail of controversy and patriotic anthems, maybe even trying to take down Michael Rapino and his Live Nation empire.
But just as in Hollywood, the real power in the music biz lies with the execs such as Lucian Grainge at Universal Music Group, Rob Stringer at Sony Music Entertainment, and Robert Kyncl at Warner Music Group. They’re the ones calling the shots, not a bunch of aging rockers reliving their glory days.
So, while we can chuckle at the notion of these “Three Stooges” task forces — whether they’re tackling Hollywood or the music biz — let’s not lose sight of the real challenges facing these industries. It’s a complex web of economic forces, technological disruptions and shifting power dynamics. And it’s gonna take more than a few “nyuks” and “soitenlys” (or power chords and rebellious screams) to untangle it. But hey, at least we can enjoy the show while it lasts. After all, in Hollywood and the music biz even the biggest crises can be turned into an entertaining spectacle.